If you weren't aware, the B.F. and I live together and work together. Yes, that's right, we do both and haven't managed to murder one another. On Monday, we were ready to head out the door at about the same time. This, I might add, is very odd. We are never ready at the same time. He is always 15 minutes, if not more, ahead of me at any given time. If I say, "I'll be there in five," what I really mean is I will be done flat ironing my hair in five minutes. That doesn't count on throwing on jewelry or my shoes. So by the time I pick those out, I'm out headed to my destination, driving at 80 mph because I'm always racing to be somewhere that I should've been 15 minutes earlier.
So, at this rare moment, we are beside ourselves because I'm ready. The B.F. says, "Do you want to ride into the office together?" Hmmmmm, why not, right?
The B.F. comes around my office at about 4:30 and I'm on a conference call, so he rudely tries to talk to me as I'm listening to this vendor chat about some search capability. I mouthe, "I'll be ready at 5:30 p.m." He nods and walks out.
At this point, it's about 5:15 p.m., so I send a few final e-mails and make my way over to his office to check if he's ready. Yep, you guessed it, the bastard split on me. Laptop. Gone. Lights. Off.
I'm laughing thinking he must be in the office or outside playing cornhole. I call him from my work phone because I left my cell at home.
The B.F. -- "Hey, when are you going to be home?"
Me: "Ummmm, did you forget something?"
The B.F.: Laughter. "Oh my god, I fucking left you."
We are both laughing.
Me: "Seriously, B.F., how did you leave without me. You came by my office and I said I'd be ready at 5:30."
The B.F. "I don't know."
To make up for his absentmindedness, he made dinner, which he was planning on doing anyway but it looked that much better for him. I guess it's a good thing we don't have or a dog or my cat anymore. He'd probably leave it outside and forget about it.
After dinner, I checked my voicemail and he called me twice and left a voicemail right before I called him asking me when I'd be home. (He sounded very sincere. Like he had no idea that we drove in together.)
Boys. Get a memory.