tampons and tools

Friday, October 19, 2007
There comes a time in every guy's adult life when he needs to grab his manhood by the balls and walk into a Target and purchase his girlfriend/baby mama/wife/daughter a box of tampons. (You can handle it.) I've never quite understood the fear in being around tampons, buying them or even saying the word, without whispering it. What happens if there is no period? Then, only then, is where the real fear starts.

Let's compare a guy act that girls often do. Girls buy condoms all the time. It's a condom for god's sake. It's benefiting both parties involved in the act. Tampons are another useful tool for both parties involved. If couples use condoms correctly, then they can both breathe a sigh of relief when the girl asks her to guy to buy tampons at her local drugstore.

Now, boys, when you live with a girl you will occasionally come across one of these useful tools. Don't be afraid. It's just cotton and a part of life -- didn't you take 7th grade health class?

Girls encounter all types of disgusting boy habits. Shaving? Come on. Thank god we have two bathrooms because the last thing I want to see is little shavings sprinkled all over my sink. Don't even make me refer to the oldest of boy habits -- the toliet seat. If I can put down your toliet seat and buy condoms, you can walk into a drugstore and purchase a simple box of tampons.


Narm said...

A guy buying tampons is like shopping at Bath and Body Works - it is total submission to being whipped. It is looking every other man in the face and saying, "Yeah, thats right, my balls are in a jar under the sink." When a guy buys tampons the word "Pansy" actually pops up on the cash register when the bar code is swiped. The cashier then looks at you and says, "That'll be $5.69 and your last shred of dignity. Paper or plastic?"

Allison M. said...

Ok, so that's like saying the word "whore" pops up on the register when a female purchases condoms.