The art of the break

Thursday, January 8, 2009
This subject of "a break" has come up with several friends lately. No, this has nothing to do my relationship - it's perfectly fine. But they are questioning pulling the plug, moving on or fighting through their difficult times.

However, apparently I'm the only one who doesn't understand "a break."

To me, "a break" is for people who can't pull the trigger to end a relationship. One really wants to end it, but you don't want to end it because you will hurt the other person's feelings. Or, you simply see a hot piece of ass they want to try on for awhile, but still keep the you hanging around when they are finished with the newbie.

What does "a break" really solve?

It's a free pass to slam everyone from your coworker to the bartender, have girls/guys night every night and increase your chances of catching something ugly.

However, I'm told that it's "to figure things out and really determine if you want to be with that person. It's a chance to step away and decide what you want to do."

No, sorry, Fantasy Land doesn't exist.


Tova Darling said...

I'm totally with you on this. You either want to be with someone or you don't. If you need to stop and think for an extended period of time about whether or not you want to be with someone, then you don't want to be with them.

Katelin said...

it's okay i definitely don't understand the break either. i think it's sort of silly, but hey to each their own right?

Always a Bridesmaid said...

You're right. It didn't work for Ross and Rachel, did it?

Narm said...

That video was amazing. And painfully true.

adriana said...

I've never fully understood the "break" thing either. If the couple were still being exclusive, just taking time apart to think, I can *sort* of see it, but I think mostly it's bullshit.

I also don't understand the break up/make up/break up shit. If my relationship is over, its OVER. End of story.

Ashley said...

I agree!

(And with Always a Bridesmaid, too. Too funny.)

Miss Fabulous said...

I also agree with you. If a guy asked me to go on a break - I would break his legs and kick him to the curb!

lucklys said...

absolutely. when i was just a young, naive little high schooler, a "break" was supposed to be everything you said, and then was actually everything else you said. now, it's just a sorry excuse to hold onto something you know isn't going to work, but you want to have that security there while you go bang other people. nasty.

Chloie said...

I agree with you and Tova Darling. A break is a break-up. Think things over before you ask for it.

Allison M. said...

Tova Darling - well freaking said.

Katelin - I guess.

Always a Bridesmaid - it definitely didn't work for them.

Narm - stick figures are hilarious.

Adriana - I have a few friends who break up, get back together, blah and blah. It's draining.

Ashley - Do you do the break?

Miss Fabulous - I don't want to date you.

lucklys- 100% agree.

Chloie - Good advice.

alexa - cleveland's a plum said...

i actually don't think a break is all that bad of an idea, i have a lot of friends that broke up for a bit and it only helped the relationship.

rachel said...

okay. i was one of those people too... every time one of our couple friends would announce that they were taking a "break" i would go on and on to steve about how i didn't believe in taking a break... either you work through it together or stop wasting your time. but you know something? i inadvertently became one of those people on a "break". it wasn't intentionally, but that's what it ended up being.

i got to a point in my relationship where i felt trapped and i felt like i couldn't effectively communicate with steve anymore and it scared the shit out of me that the rest of my life could be like that... so i ran. instead of manning up to everything and talking to him, i ran.

then i realized that i couldn't live without him.

so we took a break, i reevaluated what i wanted out of my life and decided what we needed to change in order to make the best life for both of us.

i don't recommend the whole break thing, and looking back i would have tried harder... but it worked for us.

a year ago though? i never would have believed i'd be one of those people to say "oh, we're taking a break". nope.

Mel said...

The "break" is total bullshit. *sigh*

Maureen N said...

I pulled the "I just need a break thing" on a guy once and I hate to admit it, but it was because I didn't have the balls to fully break up with him. I still feel awful about it to this day.Breaks = bullshit.

Medicated and Motivated said...

Tell them to read "It's Called a Breakup Because it's Broken". It's a hilarious book and it's dead on.