Cleanse is not my middle name

I am not a cleanse person.

Not in the slightest bit.

There. I have said it. 

Now I would by lying if I thought I was cleanse person before I started my Dr. Oz 3-day detox cleanse. I had read all about the  cabbage soup diet, the master cleanse and even the Blueprint cleanse, which is the hot thing right now for women of any age.

Based on a few coworker's experience with this one and seeing as it is a short time period, I seriously thought I could pull it off as I shopped at Heinen's and Earth Fare, picking up the fruit and vegetables plus the vitamin essentials as part of my new 3-day regimen. I was happily putting my favorite fresh fruit and vegetables into my cart, humming Cheryl Cole's song in my head and picturing a more slender and thinner version of myself in a mere three days.

Only $126 later, I felt empowered and ready to take on day one with my trusty KitchenAid blender as my new BFF in my cleanse journey to ridding my body of all the toxins from the past month. Or so I'd hoped after realizing I had fallen off the wagon and needed to get back on a regimen.


Lunch drink: cucumber, celery, pineapple, almond milk and lime

Day one morning and afternoon I felt amazing, full of positive thinking and giving myself invisible high fives but by dinner, I was pretty much done for with these smoothies. I wanted food. I needed food. I caved and ordered my favorite pho dish and surrendered myself to the most amazing Vietnamese soup ever.

Not one to give up, I started again on day two with my morning smoothie packed with raspberries, bananas, kale and a dash of lemon and as I made my brightly green processed lunch smoothie pictured above, I knew I was done with this cleanse idea halfway through the chunky concoction which prompted the following tweet.




In my effort to get back on track, I gave this cleanse the college try, started working out daily again but I'm going to stick to the path of eating food. Real food. The kind that is alive and I have to grill, broil or bake into Paleo type dishes because this whole smoothie thing is just not for this girl.

8 comments:

Heather said...

I give you credit for trying!

CLEshopaholic said...

I would do blueprint again, but 3 days is rough.

Crystal @EatDrinkClev said...

I did the Anna in the Raw cleanse which is almost identical to the Blueprint and loved it. I actually wasn't hungry...and that's really saying something!!! If it wasn't so freaking expensive, I'd do it for 2 weeks.

But I have to agree, the thought of chunky smoothies sounds REALLY bad. Don't blame you for hating it!

Katie S said...

I have a Vitamix blender and it's fab for making chunk-ftee smoothies. But in terms of doing a cleanse? I'm not sold on them. I feel like it's like a new way for women to hate their bodies, so I refuse to participate. Real food makes me feel better anyway. Your results may vary.

Fizzgig said...

good job for giving it a go! i did the mean green juice cleanse, I think I almost made it a week...It really did make me feel great, but I missed food in my mouth!!

Anonymous said...

I did that cleanse thing one time...the day before my colonoscopy...Worked great!!!!

Beth @ CraveableCleveland said...

Oh my, I tried a cleanse once too. Horrible!! I felt headachey and weak and all of the things that I think mean your body needs real (healthy) food. At least you know now! We've all gotta try once :).

Alana said...

i'm with you, girlfriend! i need food! but, props for trying!!!